Hayley Williams for Bust Magazine
I slept for 987 hours, maybe because i spent an hour and a half crying last night. About Andrew. It’s the most i’ve cried about it since it all ended. Which i realized was a month ago. You know how i’ve said i can’t feel the love i had for him anymore? Well, while i was crying and going through the memories, i felt it again. And it made me cry more because i remembered that i’ve never felt that feeling any other time except about him. And it’s gone. I was almost begging God to give us another chance. That sounds really stupid. And of course, all of this reminds me how alone i am and how no one wants me except married men who use me for sex stuff. And it’s about three times worse because it’s not like i’m actually having sex with these people, it’s over the internet because if it was in person, it’d never happen because like always, they wouldn’t want me. Around 3AM, i propped myself up on my bed like i was when Andrew and i were laying here. Yep. How pathetic is that. And then i fell asleep. I fell asleep on top of my blankets which i haven’t done in weeks because it’s freezing, but i didn’t even care. I woke up around 8 and i was so bitter and unhappy right away. But i went back to sleep and woke up about a half an hour ago and i feel better. Either PMS is kicking my ass this month or i’m really coping this poorly with life. Anyway. I had dreams about puppies and Jon Hamm hahahaha. I woke up thinking about Mad Men. I’m almost through season three. IT’S SO GOOD. I’m a little more than halfway through season two of One Tree Hill. I watched it before this season but i only remember about half of the things that happen. It’s hard to watch because it’s so soap opera-y. The best thing about it is the music. Well, i’m going to go be fat and watch Mad Men. It was 34 degrees this morning. It went from being like 80 degrees to this in a month. This place is dumb.
Panic! At the Disco Album Release Show in Las Vegas (x)
The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)
look at the pretty